Ps. Niko Prajogo - The Great Family

Sunday, 1 July 2018, 1.30 PM | Grand Hyatt Hotel, Singapore

Summary of the Sermon by Pastor Niko Prajogo at Bethany International Service, on Sunday, 1 July 2018


The Great Family


The theme of our church for 2018 is Focus on the Family.  The family is God’s own design.  Neh 4:14 (NIV) “Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes.”


Why fight?  A great family does not happen automatically.  Achieving a great family is hard work and requires intentional effort.


Four characteristics of blessed godly family:


1. Great Families have Fun Together

Enjoy life with your family members. Ecc 8:15

1 Tim 6:17 (NCV) God richly gives us everything to enjoy.  Enjoy, don’t just endure.  Ecc 11:8a (NCV) People ought to enjoy every day of their lives, no matter how long they live.  God is glorified when men is satisfied in Him.  Appreciate our family members.

·         Ecc 9:9 (NIV) Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love.

·         Ps 127:3 (NLT) Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.  Gift is for enjoyment; not a burden.  Children are for enjoyment.  Do you enjoy your children?

Reward is a special present; not obligation.


Lover = Time, as one of the expressions of love is time.  There are five “languages” of love - receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service (devotion) and physical touch.  Parents, if you love your children, spend time with them.  Children, if you love your parents, spend time with them – call them, talk to them and listen to them.


Problems are always there - work is always there and our needs are always there.  Don’t let your life become too busy, too serious or too sensitive.  You can have fun while problems are still around.  Needs continue to pile up.  Phil 4:4 (NCV) “Be full of joy in the Lord always.  I will say again, be full of joy.”  Enjoy our life now.  Do not wait until when you own a nice house, go for a nice holiday, get a better salary, etc.  Singles, be happy now, because when you’re married you’ll be happier.


2. Great Families Encourages Growth (Like tending a garden)

A garden needs to be watered, weeded, cultivated and fertilised.  Luke 2:52 (NIV) “And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.”  As a family we need to grow mentally, physically, spiritually and socially.


There are many things that children are supposed to learn in their family to prepare them to go out and face lives outside of family.  What do we learn in our family?

1.       What to do with feelings

How to recognise it, express and manage it; to know if it is healthy or harmful.

2.       How to handle conflict

Resolve and clarify conflict.  When to speak, when to be silent.  

3.       How to handle loss

We teach a lot our family how to win – work hard, study hard, skills, methods, etc.  But we rarely teach them how to handle disappointment and failure.  We do not want kids to win all the time.

Loss is not the end.  We need to experience it to overcome it.  Prov 24:16 (CEV) For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again.”  Resilience; ability to get up again; not giving up easily.

4.       What values matter most (1 John 2:15-17). 

The world has three temptations – lust of flesh, lust of the eyes, pride of life possession (materialism, money), passion (pleasure), and position (importance, status, popularity).  We need to teach our family values from the Bible – we are to love God not the world.  Mat 22:37-39 (NKJV) -  Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’  This is the first and great commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’


How to teach our family?

·         Teaching through examples – John 13:14-15.

·         Teaching through conversation – Deut 6:7.

·         Do not teach through criticism.

Do not emphasize what you dislike, emphasize what you want to see.

Don’t be rude; be polite.  Don’t lie, speak the truth (Col 3:21, Eph 6:4).

·         Do not teach through comparison – Gal 6:4.


3. Great Families Protect Each Other (Umbrella)

Mat 5:45 - Good things and bad things happen in life.

Ecc 4:9-12 - Do we experience this in our family?

·         Do we work together well as a family?

·         Do we help other family members up when they fall?

·         Do we provide warmth?

·         Do we fight together if they are under attack?

We don’t need another criticism at home as this leads to more fights.


4. Great Families Serves God and Others

Serves God by serving others.  Heb 10:24 (TLB) In response to all he has done for us, let us outdo each other in being helpful and kind to each other and in doing good.”  We are blessed to bless others, it is better to give than to receive.  Jesus came not to be served but to serve.  Acts 10:2 1 Cor 16:15 TLB


Do we have fun with your family?  Has the “fun” element been missing from your family?  Do we grow as a family? Do we protect each other in family?
Protection from:

Change:  Wheel alignment is important after hitting big holes

Harmful Ideas: Lots of influences from others, media, games.  Give provision and protection; give physical food and mind food; sow more of God’s Word. Pray for your family, cover each other with prayer.


Do we serve God and care for others?  Joshua 24:15 – But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”